I know this is a discussion that not everyone will be able to participate in since not everyone reads books with sex scenes, but it seemed interesting, so I couldn’t help myself.
The way I review has evolved since I first started blogging, but so has what I’m comfortable talking about in my reviews. And when it comes to sex scenes in books, I’ve seen all different ways of handling that, depending on the reviewer. Some avoid mentioning them at all, some simply state that they were there in there book, some briefly talk about what they were like (e.g. hot, awkward, passionate) or how they impacted the story, and some give you all the nitty-gritty details.
So which am I? Which one are you? How much detail is too much? Let’s discuss!
Do I Talk About Sex Scenes in My Book Reviews?
Generally, my guideline, I guess you could call it, is that I don’t talk about the sex scenes unless there’s a reason to. I don’t even mention that there are sex scenes unless there’s a reason to. I suppose it could help other readers who are trying to avoid them or who are specifically looking for books that have them, but that’s just not how I write reviews. I don’t have a list of things that I make sure to include in each one. I only include whatever I deem necessary to include, whatever spoke to me, whatever stood out for any reason, whatever was so amazing or so bad or so weird that I feel it’s worth mentioning. And that include sex scenes.
Buuuuuut there was a point in time when I didn’t really talk about sex scenes at all. I only mentioned them if I felt like there were A LOT of them and wanted to make sure people knew what they were getting into. But the more I’ve reviewed, the more comfortable I’ve gotten, and while I still refrain from going super into detail and mostly refrain from mentioning my own personal tastes, I will talk more about or mention specific things if I think they could be helpful to other potential readers.
Reasons Why I Might Talk About Sex Scenes in a Review
– There are A LOT of them, and I want other readers to know what they’re getting into.
– Something about them bothered me. (e.g. The characters stopped to fool around while they were running for their lives, or I didn’t feel there was proper consent.)
– They were REALLY well-written. Generally sex scenes are just part of the plot to me, like any other scene. But in my reviews I talk about the things I loved most in the book, and if the sex scenes were one of the things I loved most, they get mentioned.
– They really added to the character development and relationship.
– They were really integral to the story.
– There was a particular kink involved that other readers might want to know about.
– There were vampires involved. (I sometimes mention when books have sexy biting since not all vampire books have that.)
– There was something about the scene(s) that made it unique or made it stand out or in some way.
But again, I don’t have exact rules for this. These are just some reasons why I might talk about sex in my reviews. Nothing about my reviews is set in stone.
Is It OK to Discuss Sex in Reviews, and How Much is Too Much?
If we’re reviewing adult books, I think it’s perfectly ok to discuss them in whatever way with however much detail we want (assuming we’re not breaking the ToS of whatever website we’re posting to or being disrespectful/offensive toward anyone). Even though I tend to avoid too much detail or bluntness, it’s sometimes entertaining to read the reviews of people who don’t. But it’s also ok if someone doesn’t want to mention it all—nothing is required in a review. So I don’t think there is such thing as too much, and everyone should talk about (or not talk about) sex scenes however they feel comfortable in their reviews. But now I want to know what you think!